[just for fun]

[mr_gaeta]

This is one of those days where everything seems to go wrong.

First, Gaeta tripped getting out of bed and slammed his bad knee into the floor. Then he burned breakfast. Then he burned lunch. Down in the Milliways kitchen, half his equipment had gotten swallowed by a miniature vortex overnight (as evidenced by the sorry I opened a tiny vortex last night! note somebody left on the counter), and really, by the end of it, all he wanted to do was get room service and watch trashy movies until Louis got home.

Which, of course, means that as he's easing his way out from behind the bar, he knocks his already-tender knee against a barstool.

"Ow, frak -- !"

Comments

[aspenmuses]

There's a red case positioned at the end of the bar, and at the sound of Felix's exclamation, it suddenly emits a humming sound followed by a whoosh of air as something inflates.

"Hello. I am Baymax."

The greeting comes from a large, white, marshmallowy ... robot?

"I am a personal healthcare companion. You appear to be in distress."

[mr_gaeta]

Okay, what the frak.

"Um," says Gaeta, staring up at the...thing's face. Absently, he keeps rubbing at his knee. "I'm fine. It's fine."

[aspenmuses]

Baymax's chest lights up like a screen, and a series of 10 cartoonish faces with varying expressions appears.

"On a scale from 1 to 10, how bad is your pain?"

[mr_gaeta]

"I -- what?"

He's still so taken aback that, while seventy-five percent of him remains stuck on seriously, what the frak, the twenty-five percent well-conditioned by the Fleet jumps on the direct order. "Three, I guess? Four?"

The fourth face on Baymax's chest does have a mildly perturbed expression that matches Gaeta's pretty damn well.

[aspenmuses]

"Thank you. One moment while I scan you in order to determine the cause -- "

[mr_gaeta]

"Wait, no, you don't have to -- "

[aspenmuses]

" -- scan complete."

Baymax extends one large arm, finger pointing toward Gaeta's knee.

"I detect an inflammatory response due to contusion injury, as well as indication of scarring that may be contributing to central neuropathic phenomena. If you will please have a seat on the stool beside you, I will be better able to provide you relief."

[mr_gaeta]

"Wait, hold on, no. Wait."

Gaeta holds up a hand, trying to forestall.

"I'm fine. Really. All I did was bump my knee. I, ah -- I appreciate it, but you don't have to do anything."

Especially since he has no idea what Baymax might do. It's hard to be truly concerned by something that looks like an oversized balloon, and it seems to operate more like a specialized kiosk than an independent thinking machine, but...come on.

[aspenmuses]

"I am a personal healthcare companion," Baymax repeats. "I cannot deactivate until you say that you are satisfied with your care."

The faces have vanished from his chest, which now lights up again with a generic humanoid figure. A red oval appears around one leg; an arrow points at the knee.

"Clinical manifestations of prosthesis misalignment often manifest with pain. However, my scan indicates that you have also experienced a more acute, small-scale injury of some sort. Application of a topical analgesic patch is recommended."

[mr_gaeta]

Beat.

Long beat.



Only the tiniest bit grudgingly, "...What kind of analgesic?"

[aspenmuses]

"I am equipped with lidocaine spray and the ability to generate patch material."

[mr_gaeta]

Lidocaine. It sounds vaguely familiar, but not familiar enough.

"That's not an opioid, is it?"

[aspenmuses]

"Lidocaine hydrochloride stabilizes the neuronal membrane by inhibiting the ionic fluxes required for the initiation and conduction of impulses, thereby effecting local anesthetic action."

A beat. The figure on Baymax's chest fades.

"It is not an opioid, and does not utilize a narcotic mechanism of action."

[mr_gaeta]

Yeah, no Cylon would ever sound like it's regurgitating a medical textbook that way.

"Right." A touch dry. "Got it."

Why the hell not: his knee hurts and he's had a shitty day. Gaeta glances behind himself and takes a seat on the closest barstool.

(Not the offending one that clocked his knee. That one can frak right off. Frakker.)

[aspenmuses]

Baymax moves closer, almost seeming to mince as he crosses the short distance between them. He leans forward and points his finger at Gaeta's leg again.

A soft hiss sounds, and a light, cool spray of mist puffs out of the end of his finger and settles around Gaeta's knee.

Baymax then straightens and points his finger at the palm of his other hand. A second spray puffs out, and the palm glows bright yellow for an instant, then peels off in a patch that is the exact size needed to cover Gaeta's sore knee.

"Please remain still while I apply the patch."

[mr_gaeta]

As instructed, Gaeta remains still, eyeing the proceedings with muted wariness. If his day ends with an inflatable robot burning off the remainder of his leg, he is going to be pissed.

Luckily, the spray doesn't ignite anything. It actually feels quite cool as it settles into Gaeta's skin.

[aspenmuses]

With surprising deftness for a large pillowy robot, Baymax applies the patch to Gaeta's knee, then straightens again and blinks at him.

"Your proopiomelanocortin levels are elevated. It is a natural response to pain stressors," Baymax informs Gaeta. "I also detect that your blood pressure and heartbeat are elevated. Sometimes transtibial injuries can be aggravated by poorly-fitted prosthetics. Is yours comfortable?"

[mr_gaeta]

"It's fine, yes," he says. "I had it custom-made here."

And...huh. The pain from the earlier bump is already starting to diminish, leached away by the lidocaine. All right, then.

[aspenmuses]

"That is good."

Baymax blinks again, considering Gaeta.

"Sometimes elevated blood pressure can be caused by temporary aggravation and frustration, which often accompany minor injury."

He opens his arms wide.

"Would you like a hug? Hugs can be very soothing and comforting."

[mr_gaeta]

"Um," says Gaeta again, staring.

Give him a moment, Baymax.

[aspenmuses]

Unintelligible grunts of assent are something he is familiar with from his creator's brother! It is clear what his next action should be.

Baymax steps forward and engulfs Gaeta in a marshmallowy hug.

[mr_gaeta]

"Mmph -- !"

Wow, that is a very squishy robot. It really is like being hugged by a balloon.

(WHAT THE FRAK IS GOING ON.)

Very, very tentatively, he reaches up to give Baymax a pat on the arm.

[aspenmuses]

Baymax squeezes him comfortingly, then lets go and looks down at Gaeta.

"Your cortisol levels are lower," he observes. "Are you feeling better?"

[mr_gaeta]

"I...guess so...?"

Most of Gaeta's frustration has been replaced by straight-up confusion by this point. He supposes it's an improvement?

[aspenmuses]

"That is very good."

His chest lights up with the faces pain scale a second time.

"On a scale from 1 to 10, how bad is your pain?"